bang the doldrums (blah)

[ADALYN WARNER]

ADALYNwarner.
Am I scarin' you?

Adalyn hated isolation. So, why she imposred it on herself, she knew not why. The fucking bell towers was probably NOT the best place for it. She knew there was a possibility she could get her ear drums busted, but she didn't care. If fact, she welcomed it. She welcomed the pain, pain of any sort. She didn't care anymore. Distraught would tell the tell of Adalyn Warner. Not having seen civilization (considered to be either a) Evan or b) Xio or c) Evan and Xio together), she was alone. She didn't know where her baby brother was, all she knew was that he wasn't dead. And for some reason, she couldn't hear him. She developed her motherly sense over him during the summer, always able to hear his thoughts, no matter how far apart the siblings were. Now, however, there was nothing. The only thing in her head were the thoughts of the people around her, easily tuned out. She kept her senses up, waiting for anything from Evan. Nothing ever came.

She became so desperate in her search, she never slept. Well, hardly ever. Given she hadn't seen him in over two weeks, she would take a guess as to she slept maybe a total of two days since then, spread out. She couldn't lose him, and the thought of it, losing her baby brother, she couldn't handle it. It drove her crazy, nuts, wacko like you've never seen anyone before. Adalyn didn't know what to do with herself. Her mind was everywhere with what might have happened to him. She concluded he was avoiding her, because he got over what happened over the summer the moment he saw Xio. Figured. Adalyn hated the fact he had someone when she had no one. She wasn't the fucking perfect person people assumed her to be.

Because of this, Adalyn let herself go. Living, well, she didn't really care. She had no point being here, here being the castle, considering her brother found someone else to take care of him. He didn't need her anymore, and she didn't need him to tell her that to know for sure. The fact killed her, but she knew it would happen eventually. He would outgrow her. She just hoped Xio took care of him. Maybe, maybe. She'd come back and kill Xio if she didn't. They fit, they were good together. Adalyn would never find someone like that. Deep down, she knew she was always destined to be alone. Fuck, even her brother left her! And her parents! She had no friends, what was she supposed to do.

Currently, she was curled in a ball near one of the bells, a sight unseen. She was pretty sure they were going to go off sometime, so until then, she waiting. No one knew she was there, and no one would miss her. Evan certainly wouldn't.

[XIO BECKETT]

For the time being, Xio had decided, she needed to slow her life's pace down. Everything was just happening all at once and it alot to take in each day without wanting to strangle herself. Life was good, yes, but it was also confusing and it was because of this that she was constantly on the edge of screaming at top of her lungs. She just needed air. Someone to talk. A year ago, being alone was what she had desired. She had wanted everyone to stay away. She had wanted everyone to keep silent around her and now things had changed dramatically and sometimes it was hard not to have someone to talk to. Girl wise, anyway. She no longer had Adalyn. She was there but things were different. Like each of them had gotten on different tracks pertaining to life and she didn't like it.

She really needed to find her best friend.

There was so much she needed to tell Ada, as well as ask. Catching up would be a good start since it seemed like she never saw the girl anymore. Xio had a feeling she might be in the belltower. Alot of people seemed to go when they wanted to be alone. Perhaps it was something with being really high up; so high up, one could see the whole grounds of Winterthorne. So high up, there was pure silence in which you could hear a pin drop. So high up, no one could hear you cry or see you.

So she climbed the stairs, taking her time, and prayed to God, Ada was up here. She would be so annoyed if she came up there only to find it empty. It took her a good fifteen minutes. Probably because if Xio moved any faster, she would have fallen. (Be graceful was just so great.) Her hands ghosted the stone walls of the stairs, and she took each step and finally, she reached her destination and poked her head in.

She was in luck. Or so she thought.

"Ada?" It looked like Ada, but it wasn't responding. It had been so long since she had seen her friend. Really had a good talk with her. "Hey, darling..." she made her way to her and almost stopped in her tracks; her eyes wide. Wow. Ada looked...defeated. The sight made Xio cringe. Lack of sleep was eminent. Had she stopped eating too? She crouched low to her friend and grabbed her hands. "What happened?" This was more than Ada would ever let herself get to.

Word count: 427. FAIL!
Motive: What's going to happen? :O
notes:Ily?

[ADALYN WARNER]

ADALYNwarner.
my one and lonely

Her life seemed like a failure. Anything she wanted was out of reach. Her goals were never met. Dreams were crushed. Hopes dashed. Thinking back on it made her wonder how she made it eighteen years living a failing life. She knew early on she would have to work to get what she wanted, because relying on daddy's money wouldn't work too long. And to be honest, it still worked, because he felt bad for putting her and Evan into that situation. Hell, she could but anything she fucking wanted now. But why? There was no point. She would never enjoy anything, never ever again. Adalyn never thought herself as a quitter, typically because she never quit anything ever before. She always had too much determination for that. Now, now things were different. She wasn't the same person she was six months ago. Hell, she wasn't the same person she was a fucking month ago.

And who was to blame? Her father? Her mother? Her brothers? The people around her? Her own self? Probably only one answer sufficed; herself. She took on the motherly role when Evan needed it most, and continued it when they came back to school. She never realized there would come a time during the year he would no longer need her. Of course, she knew it come eventually, with time. Not a few months into term. Fuck, it was more like weeks really.l She lost the only person worth living for. And really, she could blame Xio, but why? Why blame the person giving joy to her brother, while she sat locked up in a room alone, destined to be alone forever.

She heard footsteps, and prayed the person wasn't someone she knew, or someone, or fucking anymore. She would have loved it if the noise was a rat. That way she could still be alone. But, of course, she heard thoughts before anything else, and it took all of 0.00000001 seconds to realize it was Xio. Well, fuck a duck. I cannot take this right now. She looked dead, and for all intensive purposes, she was. She was just a shell. The Adalyn people knew really wasn't there anymore. It would take a lot to bring that playful spirit back too.

The best course of action was to say or do nothing, she thought. So, it's exactly what the girl did. Not that she didn't love Xio, she didn't want the company. Adalyn wanted to gain the balls to throw herself off the balcony. Having been up there for close to twelve hours, she was somewhat halfway to her goal. It was hard work, preparing oneself for suicide. And fuck you, she was not treating this in a fucking kidding manner. She would do it. There was nothing here for her anymore. Adalyn wanted to scowl when Xio cringed, but told herself to keep her face blank. Besides, the dried tear tracks should tell her best friend exactly how long she had been up there. Adalyn just hoped to everything she didn't call her brother up here. Not only would that suck, but she was pretty sure she couldn't handle it.




WORD COUNT: 582
YES?: sorry, it's my way of, uhm, venting? you can text me about it. I don't care.
ANYTHING ELSE?: ily as well, my dear

[XIO BECKETT]

Eyes wide, she stared down at her best friend with the uncertainty of what to do or what to say. Wow, it was just now dawning on her much of a crappy friend she must be. She sucked at giving advice, she was afraid to meet new people and when it came to this situation she couldn’t even take a wild guess as to why Ada was sitting in the bell tower at time of day. The sun would go down soon and nights at winter Thorne were warm at all. The only reason she had even made the long climb up here was because she was lame and she liked to come back every once in a while and remember what it had been to meet Evan for the first time. Now as she was here, there were no friendly reminders, no traces of a blushing girl or the feeling of shyness she had felt then. Now it was just the icy breeze of winter and the confusion that riddled her as she crouched next to the paler girl and frown. Xio was supposed to be the pale one out of the two. Ada went out, she stayed in. Now it looked like Ada hadn’t been anywhere but this one spot for quite a while and this scared her a little bit.

The fact that she didn’t know why nor had she been around lately to maybe have gotten a hint made the guilt in her stomach twinge. Instead of focusing on her own crappy problems, she should have opened her eyes to maybe make sure that the person who always held her up was still making it. Lately, things had just been so…so distant and crazy. She’d been out of it for so long and apart from all over her little problems, she had one major one that had been taking up all of her effort. It had never been so hard to resist the itch for a steel blade but at this very second, she was certain the only that concerned her was her friend.

Times were a lot harder when you weren’t speaking to the person you were used to seeing everyday. There were a lot of reasons why she hadn’t seen Ada in so long and none of them were good excuses but it was true, the main reason had been Evan. He and his sister were inseparable and Xio couldn’t risk being around Ada. If she knew what was going on, she might hate Xio. And if she didn’t know, Xio wanted it to stay that way. Whatever was happening between her and Evan was happening and she had decided that she just couldn’t deal with it yet. It hurt too much.

All of this, however, was nothing compared to the pain reflecting in Xio’s eyes. She would have killed to see anything in Ada’s. Fear. Confusion. Hate. Anything but emptiness.


Word count:487
Notes:I'm terribly sorry I took so long!